The Fear Of Greatness

Dear Diary,
So I am scared, so scared.
One of those moments when I am so scared, I almost can’t even write. But writing will clear my head so I am going to force myself to write.
What am I scared of? I am scared of taking a step towards fulfilling my dreams..
I am scared of doing what needs to be done…

I am scared of greatness..
I am scared of greatness-yes I said it,

I am scared of growing in you Lord.
Taking the step means I am ready, means I am going to pour myself into this with the whole of my being.
It means I am going to give it my all…
But am I ready? I have such big dreams, I have things lined up for September, I have ideas you’ve dropped in my heart that I am working on…
But what if they don’t work? What if I take the step and I don’t grow like I should?
Why don’t I play safe? Why don’t I play small? Why don’t I remain on the same pedestal I am on right now? There’s no fear there, there’s no fear of failure there…
But even as I ask this, I know I can’t. I can’t play small, I wasn’t created to play small, it’s not for me.

But still I am scared- scared of the great things you want to use me for.
Scared of going all out for you.
Scared of the lives you want to use little me to touch and impact.
I am scared of greatness.
The greatness you promised me? I am scared of it…
Scared enough to cry at the weight of it all I feel…
But this is not me, this is just one of those rare moments when it all comes crashing down-one of those moments when I am reminded of how I am just a mere mortal, subject to fears like everyone else.

Your dreams for me and the ideas in my heart scare me, yes they scare me.
The greatness you’ve put in me scares me but there’s really no other option.
I will feel the fear and do it anyway.
I will cry the tears and take the step anyway.
I will fix my gaze on you and forget what my human eyes see.
I will fix my gaze on you.
I am scared, scared to my roots but I will feel the fear and do it anyway.
Yes I will.

Your daughter,
Me.

——————————————————————————————————————-
What really are you scared of my Frances?
The God who is behind you is the omnipresent and omniscience God.
He is the God who when He says GO, you can indeed GO.
When He says move, you can move.
When He says He wants to use you, He wants to use you.

What are you scared of?
I told you something’s coming.
I prepared your mind and I told you I meant it when I said “greater” for you this year.
So what are you scared of?
I’ve prepared you for this long ago.
You are scared? What are you scared of?
I am behind you. I who have started this work in you will bring it to perfection.

Rest in me. Rest on me.
Just be willing.
I am enough.
I am enough for you.
I will bring my work in you to perfection.

“Isaiah 44:8
Do not tremble; do not be afraid.Did I not proclaim my purposes for you long ago?You are my witnesses—is there any other God?No! There is no other Rock—not one!”

#Feel the fear and do it anyway.
#He makes us brave.

Happy new week dears.

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11 comments on “The Fear Of Greatness

  1. There is a common saying we should possess our lands, pursue our dreams and fulfill our destinies. We have to step out, though there is fear in our heads but with faith in our hearts, knowing whose we are and who has called us, we cannot fail!
    You have stated the hearts of many with explicitness Frances. Have a super blessed week and God bless!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. “Little me…” Hmmm! David was little David yet God used him mightily. He started preparing him for greater even when David didn’t know. All those years he pastured sheeps, God was preparing him for the day history would be changed and Goliath would be slain in the name of the Lord of hosts. He prepared him for the throne. God is preparing us all even when we can’t see it.

    Esther was bold enough to go in the presence of king Ahaseurus when he didn’t call her and she said, “if I perish, I perish” but instead of perishing, she found so much favour in his sight all because God was with her.

    So yes francis, we will go. We will keep trying. We will get back up after falling knowing that we have the ancient of days with us. The one that has prepared for us a future and a hope. So be fearful all you want. You are only giving yourself a headache because you are still going to be great if God has said you it.

    Thank you for the post Frances and I love the style of writing. I hope I’m allowed to steal such an idea. Lol

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This is as if Jeremiah is making petitions to God and God too is replying the petition. A nice poetic piece that I can so much relate to.
    Often I used to feel scared of the greatness that I will soon hit, I’ll be like can I be able to manage it? And stuffs like that…

    Well, only God is our strenght, with Him at our back we have nothing to be scared of.

    Liked by 2 people

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